Yes, maybe I do realise that the last time I was blogging was 29th August. Yes, that is a pretty long time. That’s totally my bad. At least I have good reasoning, though.
Why I stopped posting.
In short, I hated blogging. I absolutely hated it. I’m not going to beat around the bush with that, because it’s true. I tried so hard to force myself into liking it for a long time. I pressured myself to come up with blog post idea’s and when I couldn’t come up with anything, I just googled it and wrote something I didn’t really want to.
It’s a massive shame, really. When I first started blogging it felt extremely freeing, but I’ve read a lot of blogs where the author has just ended up feeling trapped. I felt like that, and also just creatively drained. That’s not a usual occurrence for me as I’m a really creative person, I’m a Florist, I love art and gardening and design. For me to be lacking creative idea’s was a new and quite frankly, unpleasant experience.
I didn’t just hate blogging because of my personal frustration. The blogging community is an… odd place. It’s nice, friendly, and I actually met one of my best friends there. At the same time, it can turn nasty very quickly. I almost felt like I had gotten myself into a friendship with a very sensitive human being. I felt I had to tiptoe as to not offend or upset anybody with my content or tweets.
“But Chaz, I’ve seen you posting!” Yeah, that wasn’t me, soz. I’m currently affiliated with a lovely company called Fat Joe (Not spon) who write posts and send them across to me to post for them. It’s been very helpful for me to keep my blog up and running whilst I took a break from the blogging itself.
Why I came back.
I’ve not been great, recently. Life has put his big boots on and kicked me right in the face, and to be honest, it really hurts! I am painfully aware that life happens like that, and I have to just get up, put a mickey mouse plaster on my face and carry on. The main thing I’ve been trying to remember that things are crappy right now, but at least they’re not as bad as they were this time last year, or the year before.
Things have been improving, and this year has been my biggest self improvement year to date. I’ve accomplished a lot already this year, and there’s still 2 more months. December will be the best month of this year so far, as my birthday is the 19th December, and my boyfriend is coming over from America for nearly a month! I’m very excited for that.
As for blogging, I missed it. I’m not sure how far I’ll delve into the community again yet, but baby steps. I had a massive inspiration of blog post idea’s a couple of nights ago and managed to come up with my next 24 posts! I was very proud of myself. I know that I’m sorted for the last couple of months of 2018, anyway. 2019 will be a whole new ball park to swim through (with my mickey mouse plaster).
Now I’m going to focus on me. This blog is going to get more variety of content, as my life does as well. I’m introducing new things for myself, which means I can share them with you guys.
I also want to include more education on this blog, so there will be more posts about mental illness, etc.
I’m glad that my hatred for blogging has dissipated.
Hopefully I can get back into finding my groove of things, and put MY big boots on.